What Would You Like to Be When You Grow Up?

"What would you like to be when you grow up?" It's a question often asked when you are a child and you don't often really know what you really want to be and most of the time, when answering, you will have chosen something that looks the most fun. Perhaps a fireman or a doctor. Most people don't go on to become what they 'wanted' to be as a child, whether it was an unrealistic dream or just because their likes and ambitions changed as they grew up.



My 18th Birthday party- theme was
 'what you wanted to be when you were seven'

For my 18th birthday party I held a fancy dress party with the theme 'what you wanted to be when you were seven'. The outfits ranged from serious to hilarious (somehow we had two girls who wanted to be ladybirds)! I went as a celebrity. I wanted to be lots of things when I was that age. One being a teacher, another a secretary and being famous was also quite high up there.

I think my main issue, which I have realised recently through counselling for PND, is that whereas most people leave this indecisiveness behind when they reach adulthood, I still want to do lots of things, to be lots of things and this makes it hard to focus on any one thing I set my hand to.

I love working, but right now I am unable to put the time and effort I need to into my business

Last week I had to make the difficult decision of taking a break from my events business. I was already finding it increasingly difficult to work around a very mobile Carly, but when Cameron's childcare also fell through, I realised that working around both kids week in, week out, would be near impossible and not fair on me or the kids to put us under that pressure. It has been hard as I want to be able to work, but at the same time, I am unable to afford childcare for them both in order for me to put in the time and effort the business needs. It's almost like having three kids, and unfortunately it has meant having to put the needs of the business to the back of my mind for the time being.

In the past, blogging has led to opportunities such as writing for More Magazine
and taking part in their Superfan issue

The positives to have come out of this is that I have been freed up to have a think about what my other passions are, apart from events. I have rediscovered my love of blogging, and when talking to my counsellor, I have realised that writing is what makes me happiest. I have been looking into freelance journalism and also rethinking about books that I have started writing in the past. Writing is something I love and can be slotted in to my life with relative ease.

Modelling has always been something I have loved

 

I have also set up a modelling page. As a natural born poser, I love being in front of the camera and I have really enjoyed taking part in photo shoots in the past. I wouldn't want to model full time as a career, but this is definitely something I am looking into doing in my spare time.

Ultimately, being a mum and doing things that make me happy
are what's important right now when battling with PND

As someone who has struggled in the past to come up with hobbies on my CV I am determined to understand what makes me happy outside of work and the kids, and I think these two things are definitely a good start. Ultimately being happy is most important right now in battling my PND so I am going to enjoy my break from the business by spending time with my kids, writing and modelling as well as looking at the positives in life. Life is too short not to spend it doing what makes you happy!

And who knows, this break might even help me finally come up with the answer to that all important question- "What do I want to be when I grow up?"

Home, Business, Children, Weddng.... An Update on my Hectic Life!

Hello again... Not really sure how many of you still see this Blog. I could in fact be talking to myself... Having somehow managed to trick both kids into falling asleep at the same time (a huge achievement considering neither usually nap in the day), I have decided to finally take the plunge and start back up with the writing. After an absolutely ridiculously long break from blogging, I am feeling a little like a newbie again and, as I say, I may well be talking to myself! However, with so much change in my life and things becoming rather stressful at the moment, I am craving the release I get from pouring things out to a blank screen, so here goes nothing...

Well, as I say, things have been constantly changing lately in my life. In April we found a flat and, in a move that seemed somehow much more grown up than having kids, Tim got himself a mortgage and we finally got the keys in June. It hasn't been total smooth sailing since. Finding damp in Cameron's room back in Summer was pretty awful and we had a period of time when I just wanted to sell up and get out of here. Luckily, after treating the damp and repainting as well as buying Cameron a new bed, things have calmed down again and we are enjoying being a little family in the lead up to Christmas. We may well sell in the next couple of years as we do plan to expand the family again sometime not too far in the future, and with it being a two bed flat we always knew it wasn't permanent. We will cross that bridge when we come to it though, and for now, everything is ok.

A picture taken just after we moved in after painting

My business also started up in April and I officially became a self employed events coordinator. Things have been relatively slow to start up, which to be honest, suits me just fine as I have had so much else going on and Carly is still very young. I have run two charity ladies events and have assisted with planning some weddings for 2014 and 2015, including my own (more on that in a minute). I have really enjoyed networking and meeting people in the area who I might not have otherwise met. I went through a period of time when I thought it might be easier to find a full time job, but for now I have decided to revamp my business plan and try something a little different in the New Year before making any big decisions. I need to remind myself that businesses don't become hugely successful overnight. They take time, dedication and a huge amount of ambition, something I have never been short of, so I am crossing my fingers for a bright 2014.

Talking of 2014... with just over three months until the wedding, things have picked up speed in the plans for our own big day! I can't quite believe how fast time has been passing lately. Carly turns one in just under two weeks, which in itself, is crazy. I remember buying her flower girl dress in the Monsoon sale this January and wondering whether she would fit into it as I bought 12-18 months. One of the main things I will be blogging about over the coming months is the wedding (as it does tend to fill my every waking thought at the moment!). I have lots coming up this month including a meeting with our new wedding coordinator at the venue, my hair and makeup trial, my hen and bridal shower and mine and the bridesmaids' alterations fitting, eek! It's one of the most exciting months in terms of planning so I will be posting lots hopefully (must.make.time.for.blogging!).

Getting some practise in being a bride for a wedding fayre's fashion show

I think that's the main updates. Cameron is now three (again, time going crazy fast) and is just coming out of a nasty bout of tonsillitis which resulted in us being in the hospital with him last week. Carly now has a nasty cough, but crossing everything she is all better for her very pink first birthday party next weekend!

Sibling love, holding hands whilst watching tv

If there are people reading this, please feel free to comment so I know I am not talking to myself (it's the first sign of madness, don't you know)!

Finding a Way Back into Blogging....

For someone who has been blogging for over a year and finds it a huge escape, I have actually found it really upsetting that I have gotten out of it. I really miss blogging, updating you all on what is going on in my life, venting about things that make me angry, and generally having somewhere where I am able to pour my real emotions out. The thing is, I don't think I have really been doing that for a long time on the blog.

I started reading a new blog a couple of months ago and I couldn't believe this person found the time to write such throught provoking and insightful posts daily when they too had a child around the same age as Cameron. I will admit that it made me pretty jealous that she was able to write things I hadn't thought of covering but felt strongly about as well. It did play somewhat a part I think in my slow decline of posting. I looked at my blog in a new light and realised that actually, I haven't written something I have actually been proud of in months.

I looked back at some of my first posts and saw what I was seeing in this other mum's blog. I saw passion. I lost passion for blogging, for writing in general and this really showed in my posts. I started using things such as Project 365 and 30 day challenges to hide the fact that actually, I had not much of interest to say anymore.

I want that to change, but I am still not sure whether it will be that easy. I am going through some pretty big changes in my life at the moment, but these things are not something I am willing to open up about at present which makes blogging as honestly as I have in the past somewhat impossible. I think one of my problems was that I was trying to force myself to blog daily, something I used to find a lot easier when Cameron was much easier to entertain, napped more in the day and I didn't have a boyfriend.

In the last few months I found myself constantly apologising for not blogging as often and at the end of the day, although I am hugely grateful for all my followers and readers, I started this blog for myself and I think I lost sight of this when so many people I know started blogging and it became harder to not view it all as a competition. I know everyone says that they write for themselves and don't mind how many followers and comments they receive, but being a competitive person by nature, this became harder the less I blogged and the less interest I received in what I was writing about. I guess you could say I had become jaded as a blogger.

I want to get back into blogging but I am going to do it gradually. I will be writing posts when inspiration comes to me and I actually have something interesting to say and update you all on rather than forcing myself to blog for the sake of blogging. I hope those of you who do follow me and read what I have to say will continue to do so. I do appreciate everyone who takes the time to read my rambles, however random they may be. I hope that I will regain my blogging mojo and begin to write posts I am truly proud of again.

Thank you once again, as always, for reading,

Emma-Louise aka Yummy Mummy

xxx

Catch Up Post!

Wow, I didn't realise how much I would miss reguarly being able to blog until I became too busy to do much at all! Luckily I have a Blogger app on my iPhone which has allowed me to keep up with the Project 365.

Now I am pretty much all settled in at the new house (there are still things absolutely everywhere downstairs but my room at least resembles a room now), I will hopefully be blogging more reguarly again.

I have lots of posts lined up including my take on Valentine's Day as someone in a couple, a tour around my new house (probably start with my bedroom as, like I say, the rest of the house is still a bit of a shambles), a couple of product reviews and the rest of my life experiences challenge I started before the move.

I am also planning  my next Vlog over on my YouTube channel. I want it to be a kind of getting to know me one for those of you who haven't been reading since the start so look out for that in the next week as well!