Cameron's Story: Chapter 2: the first couple of months

Over the next couple of months I adjusted to becoming a mum properly. Eventually my mum was allowed to go home, though I often found myself calling her for help or advice and sometimes turning up to stay over at hers when things got too much! I suffered from the baby blues and had moments where I would panic I wasn't enough for the tiny baby in my arms. I even once found things so hard that I broke down in hysterical tears in front of my mum and said I couldn't cope with everything. But, despite being sure I would due to having been depressed in the past and during pregnancy, I didn't get postnatal depression. I found things really hard to cope with regarding my ex boyfriend, and often cried about him, which I now regret. Overall though, I settled into uni and being a mummy.

As I was breastfeeding, I would only be able to stay at the campus for a maximum of two hours before getting back home to breastfeed. It was exhausting and meant I was unable to really commit to group work, so ended up having to do a seperate coursework from everyone else.

Cameron had his first set of jabs and was quite unsettled afterwards, crying a lot and being genuinely unhappy. It was so hard to see him so upset and not be able to do anything other than hold him and give him calpol. Luckily, within a few days he was back to his old happy self. From a really early age, a couple of weeks old, Cameron was holding his head alone and looking around. He has always been a really nosey baby wanting to know what's going on at all times! Cameron had an allergic reaction early on and we tried a few creams prescribed from the doctor which only made it worse. His rash was all over one side of his face which really showed up in photos, such a shame! He didn't seem to find it annoying or upsetting at least! Finally we found the cream that cured the rash and he looked gorgeous once again.

Cameron wasn't interested in toys at that stage but he loved to sit in his big inflatable chair and his winnie the pooh bouncer. He also began to love bathtime after an initial hatred of it! He loves the sound of water running and I would leave him on his changing mat opposite me when I was in the shower and he would lie there happily.



I got the best present ever on 22nd October, only 5 weeks after he was born, when Cameron smiled a proper big smile for me! From then on he has smiled so much, he is a really happy contented boy. He giggled for the first time a month later aged 9 weeks. Best thing ever!

I never really became comfortable with Cameron sleeping in his moses basket as I would constantly check on him and never sleep myself for worrying. So, most of the time, he would end up in bed with me. I don't regret this decision as it allowed me to sleep and I felt an even closer bond with him being able to cuddle him at night. It also meant that I would wake instantly when he was hungry in the night. Cameron met a few of my friends over his 1st two months including another of his Godmummy's Georgie. He also saw his great auntie and cousins again, including his second cousin Spencer who's only a year and a bit older than him!

Cameron: His story! Chapter 1: First few days

I've been meaning to get round to the next installment of my little boys journey into the World for ages!

These chapters of my blog will follow Cameron as he grew up in those first few months and then follow on from now (aged 4 months).

When you left us, we had just been through the trauma that is birth! And had spent the night alone in hospital.

The next morning I wasn't allowed visitors until 10am and my mum came just after then. I had been up all night so I was still exhausted. I had, painfully, managed to go to the toilet again and got changed into a baggy pair of jogging bottoms and a baggy grey top (I was thinking comfort, not fashion when packing thank God!). I didn't have a shower, despite feeling yucky and hot and bothered as I was in so much pain just walking! I was encouraged to walk around though so tried to as much as I could.

With my mum there I felt lots better as I hate hospitals! My aunt and nan came by with my baby cousin Spencer and was soon followed later that day by my other cousins and my brothers. Everyone was so excited to see Cameron. I just lay on the bed feeling knackered and slightly claustrophobic. Cameron was amazing and really well behaved from the start. He's also always been fine with other people holding him which is great!

The midwife helped me give him his first bath, which he hated! And we dressed him in a new outfit to take him home in and he looked even more gorgeous! I still couldn't stop looking at him and thinking 'wow, he's really here at last!' I was desperate to get home and saw a doctor who told me everything was fine with me. I had torn but they weren't going to give me any stitches and Cameron was checked over too and given the ok. So now all I had to wait for was for a midwife to observe me breastfeeding as that was what I said I was doing for feeding (seriously!). Because I hate hospitals and was really tired and hot and fed up and stressed by being watched the milk wouldn't come. It was so frustrating as I knew I could do it but they wanted proof before I was allowed home! In the end, after me crying loads and my mum talking to the midwife and explaining how much i hate hospitals, I was allowed home having been told about formula milk in case I couldn't breastfeed on demand.

Leaving hospital!

So me and my little bundle were able to go home at 6pm that night and went straight to sainsburys! (really!) everyone kept asking how old cameron was and were shocked when I said only a day old! I was pretty much waddling around the shop though, not fun! I was in agony and getting in and out the car hurt the most. After getting something to eat we went back to my nans house where we spent the first night, me, my mum and Cameron in one room, my nan in the other. I wasn't completely happy being alone so didn't want to be left in the flat.

That night was the worst, I was terrified of something happening to Cameron. So, despite having put him in the Moses basket to begin with, I ended up sleeping with him on my chest. I felt safer that way, but didn't end up sleeping  

1 day old

much again as I was still so nervous and as Cameron got hungry very often! I wasn't able to breastfeed very easily so ended up having to resort to a bottle of made up formula. That way at least I was able to ensure Cameron had fed enough. The next day we got in touch with the midwifes and they promised to send a midwife out to help with the breastfeeding, as it really was something I wanted to do.

That day I had to go to the hospital to have Cameron checked over again as the hospital had been so busy when he was born and he hadn't been fully discharged. He had some spots around his bum etc which had turned yellow overnight and looked angry and sore. The midwife got a doctor to look and he referred us to the childrens ward at the bigger hospital. It was awful as I had still not had a bath or even got changed again and I had a panic attack on the way to the hospital as I really hated the idea of being back in hospital. My mum told me I had to be brave for Cameron though, so I went up to the hospital and he was checked over and checked again, swabs were taken of his spots and finally, we were told that he was ok to go home and we wouldn't need to stay overnight after all. Aimee had come over in that time, so stayed with us when we left and we went shopping again!



flowers from my dad

We stayed at my nans again that night as my mum had to go back to work the next day. I stayed at my nans  

Cards!

with her while my mum was at work and I managed to sleep a bit. The midwife came round my nan's and tried helping me breastfeed. I still felt useless I hadn't been able to do it. She gave me a plastic cover for my nipple with holes called a breastshield and I found this a lifesaver! Without it I wouldn't have been able to have breastfed Cameron at all. He was a lazy baby to begin with and was not wanting to work for his milk. The breast shield was more like a bottle teat so he liked feeding with it better and was able to latch on easier and with less stressing on my part. It was a miracle!! Though feeding was still hard work to start with and I did find it exhausting and stressful. After the midwife had gone, I went to visit my mum at her school and show off the baby! Everyone loved him, but i think I overdid it a bit walking too far whilst carrying the baby in his car seat (I wasn't driving yet and hadn't assembled the pram!). I was still in loads of pain walking so must have looked comical walking along the road to the school and back! That night I went back to my flat, but my mum stayed with me. It was nice to be back in my new flat with the baby but I was still feeling exhausted! I got loads of cards, presents and some flowers too which was really nice! Thanks to everyone who sent something!

Over the next few days I settled into being a mum a bit more, though it was really tough doing it alone. I am so grateful for my mum being there for me, as well as Aimee and my nan as I was so tired and wouldn't have been able to do it alone. I had a huge problem with my aftercare as I had moved from Poole to Bournemouth whilst having the baby so had to go to my nan's in Poole to see midwives as they wouldn't come into Bournemouth. Midwives kept turning up at my nans without warning me and I got really fed up!

Cameron had his heel prick test done which he was fine with, didn't even cry. He also had his hearing checked which was perfect and he was weighed and I was ensured he was putting on weight fine. I had a few visitors over the next few days and at the weekend my dad and sister came to visit from Essex. At this  

sleeping

point I was STILL finding breastfeeding hard and so had expressed some milk and fed him bottles some  

few days old

of the time with that milk. I was in wetherspoons with my mum, dad, brother and sister when I ended up having to go to the toilets and express milk off as it was so painful :( I was in so much pain with it, I knew I had to persevere with the breastfeeding!

My friend Abi came back that weekend too, and moved into the flat with me. I still had my mum staying most of the time to begin with though. I was finding breastfeeding at night the hardest, so only a week into things I started Cameron on a bottle at night to help him sleep through a bit better and take the stress off me a bit.

I went back to Uni on the next Thursday, only a week and a half after having him. It was really awful leaving him for the first time, even though I knew he was in safe hands with my nan. I cried on my way out of the door and couldn't concentrate at the Uni induction. Luckily that was all we had to go in for and we were told I didn't need to go to the second induction the next day which was great news. I got back and held Cameron for ages.

I didn't want to let him go again.

 

with my nan

 

with my mum

 

 

Uncle James



With Aimee

Proud mummy!

 

With Abi

 

Auntie Megan

 

With Grandad



Uncle Daniel



Just a little update on my 'New Year, New Me'...

It's been 2 weeks since my new me started and so far, so good!

I have started wearing my new clothes, I practically live in my black skinny jeans and a variety of tops! I've ditched the short skirts and tight tops and am still loving my new hair, though it does take a bit of practise to get the fringe in the right place myself each time I wash it! In regards to looking better and eating healthier, I have managed to lose 5 pounds so far and it is most noticeable in my face and around my stomach and thighs which I am very happy about. I am determined to look great and so have bought a new exercise DVD online to get some extra exercise in on top of the long walks I already have planned.

I am also getting somewhere on the new attitude. I am not letting the little things get to me as much and, in regards to men, I am less needy emotionally with those I am in touch with and am also back on a dating site to see where that goes...

I am back in the flat full time again after a much needed break over Christmas spent at my mum's. I am determined to get back into a good routine not just with Cameron but to make sure I am taking care of myself as well. More sleep, more rest and more planning to ensure my uni work gets done on time! I have treated myself to a couple of new products as well to help with the 'new me' and will review them and update on how they are working out for me in a later blog.

Cameron's Weaning Journey Begins!

Cameron's 4 month check on Friday, and seeing on the news that some research was now suggesting 4 months was a good time to start weaning, I had definitely made my mind up that I would start weaning Cameron. I had already kind of decided on doing it at 4 months rather than 6 as Cameron is getting so hungry and doesn't seem to get full enough on milk alone.

So, with this in mind, I decided to buy some baby rice and baby porridge as well as some baby juice:



Yesterday, I started him on the baby porridge. The box suggested 1 spoon of porridge with three spoons of water so I did this and then added another half a spoon of water to make sure the mixture was smooth enough for him as he hadn't had anything thicker than milk before. Cameron was a bit unsure at first but  

Cameron's 1st reaction!

within a few spoonfuls he loved this new taste and finished all but one tiny mouthful! He was a little hungry  

feeding him :)

afterwards so had some more milk too. No wonder he's getting to be a little chubby!

He's also had a cup of baby juice which he was a little dubious of but got the hang of and seems to like. I plan to give him a little every so often, mainly when he seems thirsty rather than hungry.

If I have time tomorrow (I go back to Uni) then I will be trying him with the baby rice to see if he likes that. I plan to give him either porridge or rice daily from then on, building his tastes up gradually and going from there.

I'm really looking forward to it and like to think Cameron is too!

I won a Miss Selfridge Burlesque Comp!!

A couple of weeks ago I got an email from Miss Selfridge telling me that I had won a competition they had run for a Burlesque goody bag! I was really shocked as I had forgotten even entering it and I NEVER win anything! I was feeling a bit fed up today but then I got a parcel through the post and it was the goody bag. Cheered me up! Here's what I got:

Goodies

I love the Smashbox makeup especially. The liquid eyeliner is really good, its nice and thin which I love as it's really easy to make eyes look too overdone with a liquid liner. The eyeshadows are all really nice shades: a dark purple, dusky pink, shimmery gold and a dark grey. There is also a pot of shimmery powder which looks great! The pink lipgloss smells AMAZING and made my lips look great. The other lipgloss was a bit too vampish for me and didn't smell or taste anywhere near as nice.

I also got a makeup bag and a mirror. I have needed a new small makeup mirror for awhile and been too lazy to buy one so this was a great item to get! It's pretty tacky to be honest, having burlesque written on it but I can't complain when it was free! The makeup bag was also pretty cheap looking but will do as a spare one that I can keep at home.

I got an OPI nail varnish. Having never tried OPI before mainly due to the price and the fact that I already have so many nail varnishes! This one I was a bit dubious of as it looked really white in the bottle. It did look better on, but still not to my taste really as I prefer clear nails or dark colours. This was a nice shade, just not for me. It was a pearly colour with a subtle shimmer.



OPI nail varnish



I also got a 30ml bottle of Christina's perfume which I already knew I liked so that was a bonus. It's a great scent.

Finally, I got the Burlesque Soundtrack which I have yet to listen to but it looks ok. Having not seen the film I can't really tell what it will be like but I do like Christina's music so have high hopes.

Am a happy bunny tonight!

Rediscovering your Identity after Having a Baby: How Real Mum's feel

When I discovered I was pregnant, my whole life changed. I knew I would never be the same carefree university student I once was, but at the same time I didn't really know the person I would be. Even after I had given birth I struggled to find the new person I was. I didn't feel I was like my friends anymore and friendhsips struggled and a few friends even dropped away completely during my pregnancy and after Cameron's birth as my friends struggled to understand me anymore. How could I expect them to understand the new me when I didn't even know who I was myself?


I found myself gravitating towards new friends who had only known me after I found out I was pregnant, mainly my 'more' girls as I call them. These girls have been my rocks over the last year! They have listened to me moaning and have made me feel less of a weird lost soul as to them I was just Emma-Louise, the once pregnant, now mummy.


That's not to say that the friends I did hold onto are not true friends. They are the ones who have managed to keep hold of me as I changed into a mum.


The problem is, being a mum doesn't define me. I am a mum, I can't, and don't want to avoid that. But I am not JUST a mum. It is what I have found the hardest thing to come to terms with, not really feeling like I had an identity after having Cameron.


It doesn't help that I am a single mum, that has to be said, as it has made it harder for me to feel like a woman as well as a mum. Though this doesn't necessarily make it any easier.


I also haven't really had any time to myself to work out who I am as I went from having Cameron to a week later starting Uni in my fourth year of my degree and working on assignments in every spare minute I've had. I feel disconnected from people my own age who are studying at University but don't have the huge responsibility I have in the form of Cameron.


I find myself being slightly resentful of those who don't have this huge responsibility whilst as the same time, loving the fact that I have something that they don't. Because a mother's unconditional love is something you cannot even imagine until you become one.


I was really relieved to find out that I was not alone in feeling this way. As well as finding loads online on pregnancy and birth forums about the problem with finding your new identity after becoming a mum, I also had a huge amount of feedback when I mentioned online that I was going to write this blog and many mums came forward with their stories on how difficult it is to find yourself after such a life altering experience.

My Panel of Mummys:



Danielle, 22, Newcastle, mum to Bobby, 21 months and Noah, 4 months





R, mum to L, 3 years

 

Kira, 24, Liverpool, mum to John, 18 months



Felicity, 25, Bristol, mum to Eric, 25 weeks



Amy, 20, Newcastle, mum to Lola-Grace, 5 months

Katie, 24, Chessington, mum to Grace, 4 years

Kirsty, 23, Dundee, mum to Emily, 5 weeks and carer of Joe, 4 years

Frankie, 20, Swindon, mum to Hollie, 3 years



Samantha, 23, Gourock, mum to Ailidh, 15 months













I asked my group of mums what their first thoughts were when they fell pregnant and most were unplanned pregnancies so they were shocked.


"I remember thinking "OMG I'm pregnant, what do I say to my partner and what do I tell my mum."- Nadia.


"When I found out I was pregnant, we were both over the moon, completly shocked but we felt as if we had been blessed!"- Danielle. 


"I was 17 when I had her, my initial thought was 'I can't have a baby'"- Frankie.


"When I found out I was pregnant I was petrified! Its the end off who you currently are and its for keeps, you know" -Kira.


"I was the most shocked I've ever been finding out I was pregnant. I felt sick for days and like my world had turned on it's head. I felt a bit like my life was over and everything was completely out of my control, so I was very scared"-Felicity.


"I was totally freaked out at first, but I knew that it was what I wanted, as it all felt so right"-Amy.


"The baby was definitely unplanned as I had split up with Grace's father in the January....when I told him, he said "I cant afford it get rid of it"'-Katie.


Kirsty, however, was "over the moon, as chliche as it sounds".

Looking back to their pregnancies, a few of the mums mentioned how huge a change it was:


"I didn't have a proper job and worried about not having enough money or support around me when bringing up my baby" Nadia.


"I was terrified about becoming a mum as I'd never even held a baby and had never gone gooey over one or had a single maternal bone in my body, I was worried it wouldn't come naturaly to me and I wouldn't know what to do"-Kira.


Felicity was still finding it hard to adjust- "I gradually (and I mean VERY gradually, I still had moments when I freaked out right up to the end!) got used to the idea over the next couple of months"!


And Amy told me "I was amazed that I had managed to grow this tiny thing inside me, the best way to describe it would be pure pride!! Of course I was worried, but I knew my other half would look after the both us of...I was terrified I wasnt going to be good enough for her, that my life would be taken over, that nothing would ever be the same".


"The pregnancy was unplanned... We were still living at his dads, finance problems galore so it was a very scary time but something to look forward too. We werent sure how we were going to cope and pay for everything"-R.


For Kirsty, the "step into motherhood was diffrent from most as (I) was 3 month pregnant when my nephew was placed in my care so starting motherhood with a 3 year old and a bump.... Very hard". 
Some, like Danielle, Kirsty and Katie believed they were always destined to be a mum-


"I embraced motherhood because I always knew I wanted children"-Danielle.


"I was not worried becoming a mum as I have always wanted children at a young age and I have always been around children"-Katie.


"Being a mum is the one thing my entire life i had my heart set on"-Kirsty.


Felicity also said she always wanted children "I knew I wanted to have a baby one day, and everyone says I'm good with children so I hoped it would be ok, but I was worried about how the sleep deprivation would affect me when the baby was here, I was worried I would go mad, and I was soooooo scared of birth!"


All the mums agreed, though, that any worries or fears they may have had before having their children disappeared once they were born...


"When I had Indiana all those worries just dissapeared and I had this overwhelming feeling of love and protection for my new son (I'm sure all mums will know how amazing this feeling is!)"-Nadia.


"But now I've had my daughter I honestly believe that it was meant to be"-Frankie.


"Of course when I got settled into life as the 3 of us, all my worries changed"-Amy. 

 I asked them whether they felt they had changed as people since having a baby and many said that yes, they had. 


"I felt I became a new person, my baby was the most important thing in my life and was my priority before anything else. I think having a baby changed me for the better, it made me realise I'd taken so much in my life for granted and now I had this new life to look after, he didn't have anybody else and it was down to ME to make sure he was looked after"- Nadia.


"I think I have changed as a person as I had to grow up very quickly and my whole lifestyle had to change. I gave up work, gave up smoking, drinking, out every weekends"-Katie.


 "When you're trying to teach a toddler about manners and stuff you start to realise stuff like that a bit more and become a nicer more caring person I think...you take other people's feelings into consideration more aswell. But I must say that I am less selfish, before kids I would be like ooooo I want to buy this and I want to do this and go here, you have so much freedom to do what you want when you want but when you have kids it's all about them"-Danielle.


"Things have changed since having my daughter but I've only become more 'responsible' obviously due to having a huge responsibility of a child! Everything I do now I think how it would affect Hollie, even though I'm a single parent I'm back at college full time, I think it's setting a good example for Hollie"-Frankie.


"I do think I've changed since having john. In some ways I am so much more confident, because I have to be. I'm much more cautious as its not just me any more. And I am so so proud that I've made such an amazing little boy...I just feel like a better person"-Kira.


"Ive changed big time! i used to go out party every other night buying a new dress each time ( I would NEVER dream of wearing same outfit twice! ) i couldnt go out without my hair extensions fakse lashes false tan acrylics and heels i was so plastic and up my own arse! now im lucky if i can buy a magazine! and really lucky if i can get out!"-Kirsty.


Felicity disagreed that she had changed since having a baby but explained that "I've always been a caring, nurturing person, but now I have someone to be caring and nurturing for so I can really let that side of me shine and have a lovely outlet".


Amy agrees with this, "I still feel like i'm the old Amy, but with a bit more responsibility, my life isnt any harder, you get used to the sleepless nights and the feeding, dirty nappies and the tantrums".


When asked whether they found they had to discover a new identity, there were mixed results. Some, like Danielle and Frankie felt that they didn't so much have new identities to find but that having kids became a natural progression in their lives.


"Even if i didnt have bobby lots would have changed anyway. But you start to realise that you've changed for the better, you start to take responsibilities and feel more grown up...I didnt go out much (before), so it all worked out perfectly"-Danielle.


"I don't feel I've lost my identity as such, just found a new one to combine with the old one"-Frankie.


On the other hand, some of the mums definitely felt they had a new identity.


"I didnt feel i lost my identity more like i found a new one. A new me.""-Kirsty.


"I think my identity totally changed, appearance, personality and my social life wise. I changed my hair from long to short, changed the way I dressed, to a bit more dressy"-Amy.


"I did feel as though I'd lost my identity after having him and still do a little. Before I fell pregnant I pretty much partied and worked, both of which I no longer do now. I went from being 'Kira' to 'John's mum"-Kira. She went on to describe how she "gained 4st with john and after 18months I've only lost 1st of that... I don't recognise my body and it doesn't feel like it fits me anymore. I'm dissapointed in myself for not getting my body back and I'm disgusted with myself for caring so much when it had produced my son". 

"I believe I have definitely lost my identity" says Katie, adding that she has "changed to someone who very rarely goes out socialising at weekends", finishing by saying that "everything I buy and do is for my daughter and I will never ever be just me again".

Nadia describes how she became fed up with how she couldn't wear her old clothes anymore and that she "decided to get fit again and... had breast implants to boost my confidence and dress how I did before I fell pregnant." 

"I definitely felt like I'd lost my old identity when I had Eric, and it was confusing who I was 'meant' to be. I couldn't put the 'old' me in context with the 'new' me, and felt the new me was lacking"-Felicity. Felicity goes on to explain that "slowly over the months I've started to feel more like me again, the old me and the new me have merged together and I just feel like the old me but who is now a mummy too".  


Talking of their friends, Frankie says:

"all my friends have stuck by me and haven't stopped seeing me just because I now have a child, they all love Hollie and I know if I really need some help then they would". She goes on to say that she has "also made some new friends from having a child who also have children and I probably wouldn't have met them if I hadn't of had Hollie" She sums it up: "I've been lucky enough to keep some of my 'previous' life and also the addition of a new one".

"My social life totally changed, where as before, my closest friends were mostly male, my female friends have been the most supportive and now i'm finding myself wanting to spend more time with other women with babies"-Amy.

Kira describes a different experience explaining that "Its pretty lonely being the first of your friends to have a baby after all the initial first visits...no-one asks about you or invites you out as they think you won't be able to or that you'll be so consumed by motherhood you don't want to do things".

Meanwhile, Katie describes life as a single mum as "very VERY lonely. Ok you have a child with you 24/7 but you still need that adult conversation and to socialise", she adds that "many friends don't have time for you as everything you do you have to do as a package. Meeting people at play groups was great fun but even then you drift away from people when your child leaves play group to go to school/nursery".

R admits, "I have no friends, no outside life really since having my daughter".

However, all the mums agreed that becoming a mum was an amazing thing.

"The change for the best has to be that I'd take all this bad feeling and negative thoughts to have my son"-Kira.

"I think being a mum is the best job in the world"-Nadia.

"I believe bobby was a total blessing and he helped me through the hard times, he was my focus on life and without him I wouldnt know what to do"-Danielle.

"I'm very happy with how our life is right now and wouldn't want it any different"-Frankie.

"I couldnt imagine my life now without her"-Amy.

"Would I change having her? No!"-R. 

"But worth it? every sick covered, pooped on, tantrums throwing second!"-Kirsty.


Kira does well in summing things up: "I'm still trying to remember who 'Kira' is but without losing 'John's mum'... It must just take a while to redress the balance".




And it is refreshing to know that it isn't just us 'normal' women who find having a baby a huge change. When researching online I came across something about new mum Danni Minogue in an interview:

Dannii Minogue's style has changed since becoming a mother. The Australian beauty, who gave birth to son Ethan in July, admits she is surprised to be suddenly more drawn to wearing garments that she would never have considered before.

"I am wholeheartedly embracing the feminine looks that we have seen all over the catwalks," she said. "Being a new mum, I have, for the first time, connected with my inner earth mother and I love the sheer softness that envelopes curves rather than hugging them - tremendous for hiding baby bellies!"

"It's not a style I've been drawn to in the past, but I think fashion reflects how you feel on the inside and I'm definitely floating right now. Chiffon, chiffon, more chiffon, sun ray pleating and ruffles - divine."

Now, admitably Danni was referring mostly to her change in fashion, but the article went on to say:

Dannii also admitted she is struggling to find the time to fit in her previous grooming rituals as Ethan keeps her so busy when she is at home.
 

(http://www.celebrity-mania.com/news/view/00016724.html)

Becoming a mother is such a life changing experience, it is not surprising that many of the mums I spoke to, as well as myself, had trouble identifying the 'new' person they had become. What I can see from all the mums I spoke to is that, no matter how much of a shock, no matter how hard they found it adjusting to being pregnant or becoming a mum, whether they lost friends, gained them or kept their old ones, whether they suffered from Post-natal depression or other problems during these times, they all shared one thing. They all wouldn't change having their babies for the world. And neither would I.

So, if you are a mum and are sat reading this and feeling you have lost who you used to be or don't quite know who you are anymore, then please try and take comfort in the fact that out there are thousands of women just like you, feeling the same way. You will find that new you, or just rediscover the old you, sometimes it just takes time!

If you are struggling and would like support why not visit one of these great websites:

http://www.netmums.com/support/Rediscovering_Your_Identity.942/

http://www.babyexpert.com/new-family/relationships/having-a-new-mum-identity-crisis-21042

And for those new mums that may be finding they have lost some of their old friendships:

http://www.emmasdiary.co.uk/you_and_your_baby/article/making_friends

I hope you enjoyed reading my blog on identity crisis after having a baby. I am interested to know what other life changing events can cause an identity crisis (perhaps getting married?) so if anyone has any please get in touch. I would be very interested in linking a 'guest blog' in on these other experiences.