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Tuesday, 11 January 2011

From Bump to Baby: Chapter 1- The journey begins!

I found out I was pregnant at the beginning of January 2010. I had been partying a lot over Christmas and New Year and had lost track of the all important p word. I had a test left over from awhile before and one morning I just had this feeling that I HAD to take the test. I took it into the bathroom with me when I went to take a shower. As the screen flashed up saying 'pregnant' and my life changed forever, I was in denial and shock. I waited around for it to flash again with 2-3 weeks before calmly taking off my clothes and getting into the shower. I washed my hair, put a robe on, picked the test up from the floor where 'pregnant: 2-3 weeks' still stared back at me, and walked down to tell my mum. She was understandably a bit shocked. But my mum is amazing and she quickly came round to the idea of being a nanny! I set about telling my family and a couple of my friends but held off telling the rest until I had my all important 12 week scan.

12 Week Scan

I still remember that day as if it were only days ago! I went with my mum and, as the screen came onto my tiny baby boy, I had tears in my eyes. My life was really going downhill, with my ex boyfriend threatening suicide because of me keeping the baby and not even being sure if I would complete my degree due to becoming pregnant. But seeing my baby on that screen made everything ok again. I was creating a life, and that was the greatest thing I could do.

I wasn't sure at the time, I couldn't be, but I had a feeling that I was having a boy. I knew I would call him Cameron if he were a boy, Grace if it was a girl. More often than Grace I would call my little bump Cameron. I talked to him a lot. The truth was, I was lonely and scared and feeling like I had someone else in it with me made it easier. So I would tell him how it would all be ok, how we didn't need his daddy and how I was going to try my hardest to be the best mummy in the World for him!

At 17 weeks I was visiting family in Kent and getting ready for a family party when I began bleeding. I was the most scared I have ever been in my life. The bleeding slowed down but it had been bright red and so I went to the Accident and Emergency to be checked out. After a long and nerve-wracking wait, with a handcuffed man sat opposite me between two policemen(!), I was able to see a doctor and she felt my stomach and told me that my baby was still moving. This all happened a few days before I was due to fly to Canada. I was not convinced by what the doctor said and demanded I have a scan once I was back home as I didn't want to fly if it would put the baby at risk. 
17 week pregnant

17 Week Scan
 At this 17 week scan, which my nan and my best friend Aimee came to, I got to see my beautiful baby again. I was assured that everything was fine with me and the baby. The bleeding was unexplained, but my placenta was not ruptured and flying would not do any harm to the baby. So, another photo in hand, I left elated! We flew to Canada a couple of days later and had a great holiday, despite an epic journey there and back! Flying is NOT fun when you are pregnant and with a bladder that tiny! Having looked online and analysed the scan photo with Aimee against scans of boys and girls, we were sure I was in fact having a girl! So all over my time in Canada I was calling my bump Grace! We even took some of my aunt's, who we were visiting, baby girl clothes!
On the way to Canada
Victoria, Canada

18 Weeks Pregnant

 Once back in England, it was only a week before my 20 week scan and excited was not the word! I knew I would be finding out the sex. Waiting is fine and I'm sure it is a lovely surprise when you don't find out. But I am impatient with everything and having a baby was no different! Plus, I wanted to know what I could call the baby so I could feel closer to them as it was only me and them. So, the question on everyones lips when I went into that scan room was: will it be Cameron or Grace? And as we all know, it was Cameron! I was asked straight away whether I was finding out and after I had said that yes I was, the sonographer said straight away that I was having a boy! He apparently had flashed her! I was a little bit shocked if I am honest as in the past few weeks I had built myself up to be having a little girl. But, as I went shopping after the scan, I was so happy to be finally sure that I was having a boy and that he would be called Cameron and that I could finally buy little blue clothes!

Sucking his thumb

Cameron! At 20 Week Scan

Just after my scan was my 21st birthday. I didn't quite celebrate it as I had originally expected to (a bar crawl in London!). Instead, I went for a quiet few drinks in Hot Rocks in Bournemouth by the sea, drinking only non-alcoholic cocktails. It was nice. I even managed to look not too awful, if I do say so myself! I also celebrated at home with family and a tea party. I had one small glass of champagne for my 21st, and felt bad about that! At this point I was around 5 months pregnant......
At my 21st Birthday (non-alcoholic) drinks!

20 Weeks Pregnant, aged 21!

                                                             to be continued...........


  1. As an outsider in the whole pregnany world I found this so fascinating to read, I found it very interesting to know how you felt throughout everything. Can't wait for the next chapter xx

  2. ahh thanks hun, will prob post it tomo :) xx


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